Oh Brother.

You say it's your birthday nanananana it's my birthday too!

No seriously,
Happy birthday Matt. I have to say, 20? 20!? 20??????????????? Are we sure about this? Can't we go back to everybody being 1 something? I liked 19, I was good with 19. Yep. I've decided, 19 it is.

But again, seriously, I love you. I can't believe that you're 20. And all the time now it seems you guys are leaving me in the dust. First, I was the only one that was still a single digit age, then I was the only minor, now here you've gone and left me, again, to be the only teenager. But you know why I'm happy about that? You really are growing up. For the first time I feel like the only teenager. You've taken so much initiative in moving forward with your life. Don't get me wrong, you've still got a long way to go, but who doesn't? Moving in the right direction is all anyone can ever do right? 

WARNING: That in no way gives you permission to stop making progress. Don't even think about it. Think about Pink Elephants instead. (They are better than blue ones, magic powers and all)

Robert, I said don't think about it! Think about the elephants!

No seriously, pink elephants, what a concept, I was gobsmacked. Did you know there are pink DOLPHINS?? I want to swim with one, but they're in South America or something. I don't like shots.

I digress. 

Since you have officially left teenager/child life behind, I would like to remind you of a few things you're never allowed to forget:

Oh this too: EVERYTHING OK!

• Yoda dolls hurt if you get in the eye with them.
• Each of us has a little Criss Angel inside us. (you can remember this when you eat corn) 
• Beyblades will be cool no matter how old we get, but they DO NOT work in cardboard boxes. 
• On Wednesdays you should call your sister. Okay, not every Wednesday, but every now and then. 
• Seto Kaiba and Prince Zuko got nothin' on all those other anime jerks. 
• I once beat you at a duel. (no excuses! I said none!) 
• Snape has gotten kind of fat and his nose got larger. 
• Dad's "I fixed it!" face. :D
• "NINJA! Where you go?"
• The chicken-butts WILL peck your finger off.
• "Do what?" doesn't make sense in most circumstances. Try "What did you say?" :P
• Never argue grammar with mom, you will always lose. Always. 
• Never argue grammar with me, you will always lose. Most of the time. 
• Whether you bend and aim or not, WASH YOUR HANDS! 

Also, Matt, don't forget this either: I love you, I mean, a lot of the time I hate you, but you're my brother, that's how that works. It's a very specific rule. It's in the sibling handbook. I think you were sick that day. But I have it. I know the rule. And I love you, even if I hate you. But don't make me hate you, okay? Oh! And don't tell anyone about this love thing. I can't have you go ruining my reputation or anything. 

So, in short, Happy birthday old man, I love you and I'm proud of you, and stop this old thing. (but not the growing up thing. you're thinking about it still aren't you? Geez. You can't be trusted at all)